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Lindsay

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Entries in Los Angeles (29)

Friday
Apr252014

So, a New Yorker walks in to a bar in L.A...

I consider myself fairly laid back/accepting/open when it comes to many things.  For example:

  • If a friend is acting like a total byotch, I'll chock it up to PMS or something else that really has nothing to do with me. 
  • I try to break down racial and cultural stereotypes and judge a person based on their attitude/personality - or lack thereof - not by their religion or skin color. 
  • I'm generally not the type of person to tell my employer that I "can't" perform a certain job function.  I have a "can do" attitude/work ethic on the job.

However, when it comes to places/locations/cities/towns, I am a seething critic and snob.  As a New Yorker, I think that pretty much everywhere else in the world sucks.  Hard.  Except for Paris.  Small towns freak me the fcuk out, as do strip malls.  Falling asleep - or, shall I say, attempting to fall asleep - in silence makes my skin crawl.  Businesses that close before 9pm are straight-up lazy.  What's up with that, by the way?  The most fearful I've ever been was on a trip to a sleepy New Mexico ski town during the summer before my 7th grade year.  My family and I spent 4-5 days in Ruidoso, which felt more like a multi-year prison sentence.  There was absolutely nothing to do but stare at pine trees and pretend that I enjoyed nature. 

So, where am I going with all of this?  I wanted to give you a quirky prelude to my recent visit to Los Angeles, a city chock-full of stereotypes.  Below, I will break each one of them down, from my point of view:

  1. "Driving is a nightmare."  Traffic is traffic is traffic, people.  Seriously!  Whether you're in Dallas, Houston, Chicago, New York, San Francisco, or LA, it's just a fact of daily life.  Be it you behind the wheel or a cabbie/driver.  And, to all of you a-holes who scared the crap out of me prior to my trip, I did not let the gridlock get the best of me.  Thank you very much.  Actually, it was way less intense/dramatic than what you idiots made it out to be.   
  2. "Everyone is blonde and has fake boobs."  Wrong.  Actually, to be honest, I didn't even see that many blondes.  And, aside from my instructor at barre class, I didn't spy any fake racks.
  3. "All of the chicks are rail thin and gorgeous."  Wrong again.  In fact, there was only one gal who was so good looking that she took my breath away.  And the thin thing?  Not so much.
  4. "LA sucks."  No, LA does not suck.  You suck!  People are intimidated of LA because of its size, the necessary driving, the wealth, the smog, and the "fake people."  But you know what?  I really liked LA.  I look at all of those "grievances" as a challenge.  Bring it on!

And here are some generalizations that I made on my own (sans stereotypes):

  1. There are taco trucks EVERYWHERE.  Dream. Come. True.
  2. People are not any nicer/nastier than they are in NYC. 
  3. The hipster population in Brooklyn pales in comparison to the City of Angels.  They're fcuking EVERYWHERE!
  4. ...with that being said, where all my yuppies at?  Anyone?
  5. Rodeo Drive is merely a stretch of a few blocks.  Yep, that's it. 
  6. Perhaps I was just famished, but I found the pizza in LA to be quite delicious.  Shout out to LA Pizza Company and Bottega Louie!Bottega Louie's wood fired savory pie
  7. There's just something incredibly special and magical about those super tall palm trees.
  8. The fact that you can eat or drink in surroundings as lush as Hawaii is priceless.FIG at The Fairmont Miramar Hotel, Santa Monica
  9. It isn't all Porsche's and perfectly manicured lawns and landscape; there are some downright fugly parts of LA.
  10. Valet parking is expensive as chit, man!
  11. For an airport in such a huge city, LAX is a total dump.  
  12. Were most of the apartment/duplex complexes built in 1975?  WTF?  Ew.
  13. Tricked-out low riders are everything. 
  14. ...I forgot how sexy I find cholos.  No joke.

That just about wraps up my recent visit to El Lay.  What are your thoughts/opinions on the City of Angels?

~~~

Until we eat again,

The Lunch Belle

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